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Into the wind…

We are fast approaching November, or my “death month”. On the 5th of November it will be 4 years since Jamie died. Four. It seems like such a long time ago, yet still so recent. On the 17th it will be two years since my grandfather passed away. Sometimes it is like he isn’t gone. Sometimes I feel like he is just a phone call away, but of course that is not the case and I soon remember that.




Before he died he asked us to scatter his ashes in Newlands Forest. My grandfather was an avid hiker. Out of all the hobbies he took on in his lifetime, this was one that was consistent throughout. He loved nature and bird watching. When I was a little girl he often used to take me with him. He liked to tell the story of a trip we took when I was about 3 or 4 years old. We were walking a long a path and I was complaining a lot. He tried to ignore my whining for the longest time, putting it down to me being a toddler.  I continued complaining though and eventually he couldn’t take it anymore. He started looking behind him while we were walking (not a very safe thing to do on a hike!). Obviously I was a lot shorter than him, he was quite a tall man. After observing for a while he realized that he was brushing the bushes forward with his legs and they kept smacking me in the face! He laughed about this encounter until the day he died. Obviously I wasn’t very good at articulating why I was unhappy 😉



But I digress. On Sunday we will finally be going to scatter his ashes as per his wishes. Why did we wait so long? I’m not sure. There were times where we used the weather as an excuse and times my grandmother just burst into tears when we discussed it. Like she wasn’t ready to let go. Then there were times when our lives were just too busy. My grandmother  also brought it up often though. Rudi brought it up this time. He said to me yesterday that we’re having nice weather this weekend, why don’t we go to Newlands on Sunday? So I phoned up the family and suggested it and everybody is available. Rudi also suggested we all have a braai at our place afterwards.



I am not sure how far into the forest I will get. My back and hips have not been playing nice lately and sometimes walking can be painful. I hope to find a nice place. Can we pray for no wind on Sunday please? Don’t need my grandfather blowing all over the place and potentially ending up in my hair and going home with me and down the drain, you know?



I’ll be glad to finally put him to rest and to have his wishes fulfilled.