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Tag Archives: Pregnant

Gynae Appointment

So the day of the gynae appointment finally dawned and I was a little excited. I tried to concentrate on getting my bladder as full as possible for the scan. I was also expecting to have a pap smear and blood tests. The last time I went to the loo was at 09:30 and I started drinking water after that. Not too much, just 750ml. My appointment was scheduled for 11:15.

 

We went to the hospital and spent some time in the waiting room, which is always the case. There was nobody else there, but I was grateful for the little extra time the water had to make its way through to bladder. We went in and the gynae said no pap smear or blood tests. That was a relief 🙂 He then popped me on to the table for a scan. All I wanted to see was a heartbeat and in the very beginning I couldn’t. I was also a bit distracted by the pressure on my adequately filled bladder. I was also very relieved that my bladder was full enough since he mentioned that he would of done an internal scan if the external failed. EEK! (Never had one of those). Then there it was. The flicker. The heartbeat. I nearly burst into tears. I’m nearly crying just as I type this. Flicker, flicker. Flicker, flicker. The scan says I am 7 weeks and 6 days and my due date is 11 January 2013. Babyice was predicted to be due on 11 February 2010 and he came on the 2nd. The gynae suspects I will give birth earlier again and that it will probably happen between the 2nd and 6th of January. My grandmother’s birthday is the 6th of January. She is ecstatic.

 

The gynae also said I may announce the pregnancy to the world and that it looks well established. Yay! Our baby is about the size of a grain of rice. Isn’t it an amazing miracle?! You can see a heartbeat in something the size of a grain of rice! I’ve posted a widget so you can follow the progress at any time 🙂

 

I am very chuffed. Thank you so much for all the positive and supportive comments on my last post. Thank you for all your prayers, thoughts and messages on Facebook and Twitter. I can’t thank you enough for your unfaltering companionship during my journey x

A Special Mother’s Day

On Sunday morning we got up and went to church. After service they had a special Mother’s Day programme. Some children came up and read poems about mothers. The Sunday School children sang a song. One of the young guys from the youth sang a song too. A few children also played a song on their recorders. Each mother received a small gift and a card. Then to put the cherry on the cake they called all the fathers up and made them sing ‘Let me call you sweetheart’ to the mothers 🙂 It was a really sweet programme. The mothers were also invited for tea and cake after the programme, but I didn’t stay since Rudi planned to take me for brunch.

 

Key ring gift from church

 

Mother's Day gift from Rudi/Babyice

 
 
Rudi took us to the Spur for brunch. Unfortunately we missed the breakfast special because church ran a little later than usual. After we had enjoyed our food we went home and Babyice and I went for a nap. It felt like it went by in a flash and once I had gotten up it was time to go and visit my grandmother for tea. When we got there we discovered the entire family in her small flat. We all sat together and enjoyed some tea and cake. Once we got home I watched Top Gear (one of my favourite TV shows) and then faced the huge pile of ironing I had. I had hoped in honour of Mother’s Day Rudi would offer to do the ironing, but that was quite a stretch. It took me about two and a half hours before I was finally done and ready for bed.
 
 
 
Mother’s Day this year had an extra special meaning for me. In case you were living under a social media rock this weekend:
 
 

We're pregnant!

 
 
As you know we have been trying for our second one since about February. We have been blessed in the sense that it didn’t take very long for us to fall pregnant. I was in two minds about announcing it to the world, but I did. Facebook/Twitter/Instagram…they all have the above picture posted on Saturday morning, not long after we found out. I understand why people keep their pregnancies secret until everything is settled and they are sure everything is fine and the chance of miscarriage has dwindled. I even did that myself when we were pregnant with Babyice. In a way, it makes sense to do so. It’s sensible. I do know, however, that no matter what happens, it will be spilled on this here blog. My online friends have been with me through the deepest and darkest of shadows. Through the toughest times in my life. If anything were to go wrong (and I do not expect that anything will), it will also not be a secret. This new baby has already received so many prayers and I will receive my mother’s blessing tomorrow night. I am full of hope and a lot less pessimistic than I was when Babyice was conceived. 
 
 
It is still very early in this pregnancy. We haven’t had a scan yet. I have a gynae appointment on the 25th of May where we will get to see our baby for the first time. When I checked the due date calculator on babycentre.co.uk, they estimate that I am around 5 weeks and due around the 14th of January (again, terrible planning on my part!). Of course I’ll let you know what the gynae says when the time comes.
 
 
I am not hoping for a boy or for a girl. I am hoping and praying for a healthy baby. Rudi is hoping for a girl. The gender is really of no consequence to me. Yes, it is nice to have a pigeon pair, but to me a healthy baby is all that matters.
 
 
 
Thank you for all the congratulations on Facebook/Twitter and Instagram. I could feel the excitement and joy coming from all of you. We were overwhelmed by the response and are happy that all of you are happy for us 🙂 

Scan pics as promised

It’s Friday! Time for the scan pics I promised! We only got two pictures at our  last scan, one nice side view and a ‘gender verification’ one:
This is my good side

This is my good side

Proud to be a boy!

Proud to be a boy!

 

 

Yeah. No two ways about it. He’s a boy! There’s no denying it. The gynae didn’t even try to say ‘Look, it could be the umbilical chord’ or something, he signed for it. It’s nice to have some certainty so early on. Poor ExMi had to resort going to a sangoma to find out the gender of The Kid.

 

I’m a little frustrated with the baby shopping at the moment. Nowhere seems to have stock of the car seat we can get 60% discount on from Discovery. Nobody seems to be able to tell me when they will get stock either. It’s a really good thing I didn’t leave this late! I’ve given my details to the various stores to please call me when they have stock, but I don’t rely much on customer service. Nellie is going to have a look if there is stock in PE for them to send to me. The store assistants did not even offer to check if there was stock in any other branch. I used to work in retail and I used to do that for fashion, not something important like child safety! (Yes, OK, fashion is also important.)

 

Perhaps I’ll pop into Game and enquire about their nappy exchange policy, HoneyB mentioned that they will do exchanges with a receipt regardless of the time period that has passed. I also wanted to buy some towelling nappies.

 

Okie dokie. Enough farting around. Got to get to work.

New view

It is utterly amazing how your viewpoints can change as your circumstances do.

 

A few short months ago I could not go near a baby shop. I would get sulky hearing the pregnant woman at work laughing; bitterly thinking ‘Yes, you have reason to be happy. Just rub it in my face already’. Childish. I know. I was sulky, bitter person for a while. I hated being that way, but I really could not help it. I was resentful.

 

Now? I can’t walk past a baby shop without going in. I listen to the laughter of the the other pregnant women in the office and smile…all too aware that this would have upset me a while ago. This also makes me think about the people who have been trying to get pregnant so much longer than I did. I honestly didn’t try very long before I was knocked up again. I was jaded by my grief and every passing day without a baby in my womb felt like a million years to me, but realistically we didn’t try for very long.

 

I know of people that have been trying for anywhere from 1 year to 5 years. Some already have a child/ren, some don’t. I know the heartache I experienced every month when we were unsuccessful, although shortlived it was unbearable. Eventually I decided to stop putting myself and Rudi under a microscope and stop focusing on it. Emotionally I couldn’t do it anymore, it was terrible. I could not imagine having to go through that for a year…or for 5 years. For those of you who have, I take my hat off to you.

 

On Saturday I finally took my phone in for repairs. It wasn’t unusable, but it was annoying that it kept switching itself off randomly. Leebeesa was kind enough to lend me her spare phone while my phone is in. Unfortunately my phone has been sent to Johannesburg for repairs, apparently it needs a ‘higher level’ of repair than they can manage in Cape Town. This can probably take minimum two weeks. I miss having my phone. I miss being able to connect to the internet when I’m not at work. Plus Leebeesa’s spare phone is her old phone which means the battery life is not what it used to be. I can’t tweet much or play games for too long without it crying out ‘Battery low!’ I used to use Nokia…until I had problems with about 3 consecutive Nokia handsets, I decided to change brands. I now use Sony Ericsson and the one I have now is really the first one I’ve had a problem with. The problem isn’t earth shatteringly service affecting, just annoying so I’m going to let it slide. I just hope they fix it properly the first time. Something that Sony Ericsson allows me to do that Nokia doesn’t is toggle between applications. I can do more than one thing on my phone at the same time which rocks! On the Nokia, let’s say I’m busy checking Facebook, if I get an SMS I have to disconnect the internet, exit the browser and then read the SMS. With my SE I would simply bring up the SMS on top of my browser, read it, reply or whatever and bring up my browser again. No interruptions. This is the extent of my frustration though and I’m lucky to have a phone to use in the meantime.

 

I am currently totally overwhelmed by Babyice’s impending living quarters. There is currently so much crap stacked in our second bedroom. I’m going to have to do a major overhaul and get rid of a lot of crap that I’ve horded over the years. I’m a sentimental one. I still have letters that we used to pass around in primary school, old diaries and homework books (plastered with magazine pictures, noteable events for any given day, etc). Throw away all my old memories? I’m going to have to let go of a lot of stuff. Currently Babyice has one shelf in our cupboard and it’s stuffed. I’m also going to have to get rid of some old clothes and things to make more space in the cupboard for Babyice’s clothes. *sigh* So much to do! Although I would love to wait for my ‘nesting’ to kick in, I’m afraid to leave it so late.

 

I have also determined that I can no longer go grocery shopping. Something about being in a shopping centre makes me ill. On Monday Rudi and I went to buy some groceries and I started feeling sick. When we got home I actually got sick, which I haven’t in weeks. It was horrid. I was feeling so terrible (and sorry for myself) that I started crying. Rudi being a man got annoyed with me and didn’t want to believe that I wasn’t feeling well. He was saying things like ‘It’s always when you’re with me, you never “feel sick” when you’re out with your friends’…little did he know that on Saturday when I was with Leebeesa in a shopping centre, by the end of our trip I was green around the gills.

 

Good news is that our burglar bars are being installed today. My landlady promptly responded to our request for one and by tomorrow I should be able to apply for insurance for our household contents.

Do I look fat in these pants?

Screeching tires are the most annoying sound in the world. Guess what Grand Tourismo 4 sounds like? Constant revving engines and screeching tires. Ugh. Last night when we got home, he went straight to the Playstation. Then it was Grand Tourismo until it was time for my soapie. After that he insisted that there was nothing worth watching on TV, but there was.  I’m not phased right now. This will be a small sacrifice! *rubs hands together*. When my Sims 2 arrives…which it will probably only do at the end of next week or the week after, I’ll be hogging the Playstation! Then I’ll turn around and say ‘What about all those nights you got to play Grand Tourismo?’ he he he. Besides, I’m happy that he is home and out of mischief 🙂

 

I climbed on the scale last night, expecting not to see much change (as my weight hasn’t changed too much in the last 3 months) and WHAM! Hello extra 3 kilos. Where the fork did you come from? Oh. Maybe all the chocolate I’ve been eating. It’s starting to catch up. Forkitall. Look, I’m not worried about gaining weight while I’m pregnant, really. I know I’m supposed to gain weight. I accept that. I just don’t want to be one of those women who gains 40kg while pregnant and loses 10 when the baby comes out. Fat is like forever bond on my body. Once it’s there I don’t really get rid of it. My life so far is a testament to that. I need to remember that pregnancy is not a license to eat whatever I want. I’m going to have to deal with the consequences after my baby is here.  I sound like I’m being very clever about this, don’t I? You may be saying ‘She’s thinking straight’, but after I came to this realization last night (also after having stepped on the scale) I had some Aero. Nom nom nom. Rudi wants us to go back on our healthy eating plan and I don’t object to that. I think we should go back on it. Plenty of fruit and vegetables and mostly white meat and fish. It’s a healthy, balanced eating plan which will be good for Babyice and myself. I just don’t know when we’ll get around to starting it. Wenchy was so cute on Twitter last night. I said ‘3kg just *appeared* on the scale. It better be water retention’, she replied ‘Water retention doesn’t wear bibs’ <- She cracks me up!

I’ve ordered Shantaram and Sims 2 Platinum from Kalahari. Delivery can take up to 10 working days. Let’s hope it doesn’t. After mentioning that I ordered Shantaram on Twitter people started saying that they had read it and that it was awesome.

 

The taxis and busses are on strike today again. They always seem to strike on a Wednesday when my housekeeper is supposed to work at my place. It doesn’t really happen that often, but it always happens on my day. So tonight when I get home I’ve got loads of washing to do…and after that…loads of ironing. I don’t do ironing well. I particularly hate trying to iron sleeves. You can’t put the sleeve around the ironing board, so it’s really difficult to not iron creases into them. We’ll most likely have to tumble dry everything as the weather is not great here at the moment, but because we’re stoopid we forget to take the stuff out the tumble dryer while it’s still warm so that the creases will just hang out. Perhaps I’ll do a load, and let it tumble dry while I’m at church then take everything out when I get home and hang/fold it immediately. Sound like a plan. Then towels, undies and pyjamas. Those can dry while we sleep with no worries about creases.

 

I’m working this weekend, but I’ve taken off Monday and Tuesday in lieu of overtime worked…so I’m not too bummed about it. Yes. I know I just came back from leave, but mommy needs her rest!

Babyice – The nuchal scan

Ok…so I don’t have a scanner at home…so I took photos of the scan pictures with my camera. Forgive the quality! I’m sure you just want to SEE 🙂

 

Is that a willy we see?

Is that a willy we see?

Chilling

Chilling

We're pretty sure that's a willy...

We're pretty sure that's a willy...

Stretching our legs...

Stretching our legs...

Lying still for one second...

Lying still for one second...

 

Babyice was wriggling around the WHOLE time. So much more than James ever did…oh…another surprise…the doctor had my amnio results from my last pregnancy…and James was a Jamie! Hectic. Another mindshift!

 

Anyway…she didn’t see anything that bothered her, said that Babyice looks normal and movement and everything is normal. Babyice was swallowing and had fluid in the stomach which is all good. The bridge of the nose was visible and the fold of the skin in the neck was 2.1 which is great. I was still sent for a blood test afterwards to confirm as they can’t always tell everything on the scan. I told her they can shove their amniocentesis. I don’t want one, but she doesn’t feel like it will be necessary. Shame…while in the waiting room I heard the receptionist speaking to a lady that had to come in for an amnio today. Sucks 🙁  Anyway, Babyice looks fine and we are ecstatic!

 

The doctor is pretty certain that Babyice is a boy! She printed out two scan pics pointing towards what she says is undoubtedly a penis! Rudi is super chuffed…so am I! I actually felt quite sorry for Babyice being shaken around like she did…Ok…I’ll start saying “he”…He would lie on his back so she could get the neck measurement. This one likes to lie on his tummy like his mommy 🙂

 

Last night with Tannie was a false alarm. I told her My Evil Mother is on the prowl and trying to come to her for help and she said she wouldn’t dare set her foot in her house again after the last time and I was caught up on some more gossip about My Evil Mother. Eish. That woman. So…I don’t think I will have to worry much about Tannie trying to wriggle her in here.

 

Yay for us! Yay for Babyice! Yay yay yay!

12 weeks

So yesterday I was 12 weeks pregnant. I saw that my ticker updated that my baby has fingerprints now. Wow. Fingerprints. That’s quite amazing. Wow.

 

I am still in awe of the miracle growing inside me.  It came unexpectedly again the second time around. I had given up. I had thought, I’ve been trying for so long now…and my heart can’t take it anymore, I’m going to switch off the baby making part of my brain and switch on the I-can-do-whatever-I-want-pass-the-wine side of my brain. I relaxed and it was lovely to relax. I worked through my grief in a healthy and unhealthy manner and it started to feel good. I started to feel good and here I am…about 7 months after James was gone, babyice was here. Oh yes! I decided to call our baby “babyice” on Twitter and on my blog. I was sitting at the dressing table the other morning putting my face on and it came to me…and I couldn’t figure out why I hadn’t thought of it before.

 

Next Friday we go for our nuchal scan. I am excited because we’ll get to see our baby again and we might even be able to tell whether to start shopping pink or blue…but I’m also scared. Scared of hearing those words again ‘Something is bothering me here’. Scared of the long silences while scanning, wondering if they are preparing to give me bad news again. Scared of feeling like a complete and utter failure. Scared of having to feel tons of guilt because it could be something I did. Afraid of being judged again…“Why can’t she have normal babies?”  Scared of having to make another decision I don’t want to have to make.

I long to hear the words ‘Everything looks perfect’. I think I’ll cry. I’ll definitely cry. I cried at our last scan when all I could see was a blob and a tiny flicker on the screen. I feel like crying right now. These hormones are killing me!

So I’m excited…but I’m really scared of being too excited. I was SO excited for our last scan with James…I counted the days…and then my whole world crumbled around me.

 

Everyone, including my gynae is very positive about this pregnancy and everything being OK. Of course they are. I have a very good feeling about this pregnancy, but my certainty wavers. I need to trust and have faith that things will work out this time.

 

Rudi is being a bit on an insensitive dufus. I had some backache and cramps yesterday and he said ‘What? You having the baby now?’ He doesn’t seem to understand what that would mean…then we got into a fight because he thinks I’m being oversensitive and shouldn’t be interpreting things that way. He suggested we watch a movie last night. What movie does he select? Shoot ’em up. If you haven’t seen it, it starts off with a huge bunch of men trying to shoot a pregnant women. The movie’s hero tries to save her and helps her deliver the baby. Shortly after the baby is delivered the mother gets shot in the head. WTF is he thinking?!

 

Another thing you might not know about me is that I have a fear of car accidents and heights. Whenever I am driving (or even a passenger) on a mountain pass I freak out. Even driving over some bridges. I see myself driving (or being driven) through the barrier, the car falling, rolling and being smashed to a million pieces. Sometimes these delusions even go as far as me thinking about whether or not I’ll be able to reach my cellphone and if I did who I would call first and whether or not I’d be able to speak. I know! It’s crazy paranoia! I can’t seem to help myself though.

 

Now I’ve read stories about the houses of pregnant women being broken into and malicious attackers, realizing that she’s pregnant, kicking or shooting them in the stomach. Do you think I can get this crap out of my head? I hate being left alone at home, especially at night now. I keep thinking something like that is going to happen to me, although there’s only really a small chance.

 

So yes. That’s me. Not as normal as you thought. Some of My Evil Mother’s crazy genes leaked into mine.

 

One more week till the scan.

11 weeks

So tomorrow I will be 11 weeks pregnant. The nausea seems to be less now than it was last week *touchwood* Sleeping on my stomach is impossible. It hurts. My skin is very dry and is itchy in strange places, despite applying cocoa butter oil (intended for the purpose) or body lotion – which I am terrible at doing. No, I can’t ask Rudi, he says he doesn’t like the feeling of cream on his hands. He is not the first person I’ve heard say this, so I’ll believe him.

 

I’m feeling rather sore in my abdomen today, but it’s not cramping so I’m not worried. I must assume that this is due to the migration of my womb upwards. My gynae told me to expect it. He also told me to expect feeling pressure on my bladder, which I most definitely do. It’s most annoying to think nature is calling you rather loudly, only to find out it was practically a false alarm.

 

Another rather alarming thing is that my tummy already seems to be getting bigger! At only 10 weeks! I had read before this pregnancy that you can start showing at 9 weeks already, but I thought this might be slightly exaggerated or that my first pregnancy might not have counted as I didn’t carry to term. I was wrong! I’ve already thrown my jeans in the back of the cupboard and switched to comfy pants with elastic (SO sexy – I know!) and made sure the few new pairs I have aquired have some room for growth. I think I’m going to massive. Yes. I’ll post pictures once I start looking pregnant rather than just looking like I have a fat belly.

 

I <3 my landlady. She is so lovely and accomodating. I’ve never needed to ask her for an extension on rent or anything, but she is just so nice.  Our original rental agreement said that our rent will increase with 11% every year. We’ve been living there for almost a year now so it was time to let her know whether or not we’ll be staying. I informed her a while ago that we don’t intend to move and today she e-mailed me to ask me if it would be okay if the rent went up by 9%. Uh. HELL YES! 🙂 I don’t know if she forgot about what was written in the previous rental agreement, but she offered it and I snapped it up. The previous agency we rented from had zero service delivery and increased our rent with 10% each year. This landlady had the entire place painted out within two weeks of me suggesting it needed a coat of paint. Enough said.

 

Thank you for all the positive feedback on the site guys! I really appreciate it! My twitter feed will be up as soon as my host upgrades to PHP5 (no I don’t know what I actually just said).

*mwah*

Sad thoughts

Reading cathjenkin’s blog post to her departed dad got me to thinking and got me to crying. It sounds like her father would have been a wonderful grandfather.

I am very fortunate that I have a wonderful grandfather. I was lucky enough to have a grandfather who LOVES me and wanted to teach me things, wanted to spoil me, wanted to watch me grow up, wanted to aid the process…he still does. He is an awesome grandfather. The.Best.Ever. He would take me on nature hikes and show me things. He would take me to the zoo. He would take me to a farm to go and see the horses. He would buy me books and encourage me to read.

My grandmother? A wonderful woman. Oh she is so wonderful. I love her so much. She would kiss my knee better when I scraped it. She would sew my button on after I’d ripped it off on some adventure. She would iron my bed so that it was warm when I got in, tumble dry my clothes and towel while I was in the bath so I could be snuggly and warm when I got out. She would rub Vicks on my chest and under my feet when I had a cold. She would make my hot water bottle. She would blow dry my hair while I wildly protested so I could look pretty for church.

They looked after me when My Evil Mother messed up (more often than not I’m sure). When My Evil Mother was in so much debt that we didn’t have food to eat, they took me in. For years they carted me to and from school.

I can’t even mention everything they have meant to me. How important they were in shaping who I am today (the good bits!)

I am terrified of losing them.

My child will not have the privilege I had. My Evil Mother…I don’t even KNOW what I’m going to do about her and the relationship she will have with our child. Rudi’s parents are OK and will love our child and spoil him/her…but it won’t be what *I* had and I don’t think it’s selfish of me to want that wonderful experience for my child.

My grandparents aren’t getting any younger. Perhaps by the time our child is old enough to start appreciating the experiences with them, they will be too old to make those things happen.

*sigh*

I guess I’ll just have to be a much better parent. To make up for what our baby will miss out on. So sad.

*MAJOR YAWN*

*yawn* I am so tired I feel like my head is going to fall off. This morning I rushed to get ready and then crawled back into bed for 10 minutes. I would SO much rather have stayed in bed and slept. Keeping in mind that I’ve been working for 11 days straight now. That doesn’t help. *yawn*

It doesn’t look like sleeping late will be forthcoming this weekend. On Saturday I have to go and renew my car license…it expired on the 30th of June already and I’m already into my 21 day grace period. Then at 11:30 I have a hair appointment.

Sunday morning will be church and on Sunday afternoon we’re going to watch Ice Age 3 in 3D with Beauty Queen, SLK and a bunch of their friends. Quite looking forward to that.

Weekends are too short dammit. Three days. Is that too much to ask? I’ll still give four full days to my employer. Just ONE more weekend day. Either that or I should have become a construction worker or doctor. With all the strikes going on at the moment I would have been granted some time off.

Going to bed at early doesn’t seem to help much either, although Rudi decided it was more important for him to go out and watch darts last night than to spend time with me, so he did wake me up when he got home and then I had heartburn so struggled to get back to sleep. I’m actually quite annoyed with him for going, but what can you do? I suppose he needs some time away from me as well. Hmph.

So I’m 9 weeks today. The appointment for my nuchal scan was made for 7 August 09:00. I will probably be anxious and nervous before this scan as it will be done with high definition scanning equipment and this is where we’ll get our first indications of what exactly is happening inside me at the moment. My ticker says our baby has fingers and toes already…so we’ll most likely be able to see a whole lot more by the time 7 August rolls around *fret*

Ok. Enough of that.

I’m going to have a nap on my desk.

ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

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