Since going through the sleep training process and seeing what it did for us, I was an advocate for sleep training. It has made and still does make bedtime wonderfully easy. The whole sleeping through thing has not been a great success though. All readers of this blog know that Rudi has always worked against me in this respect. Eventually I just refused to get up and Rudi started doing it. He was often resentful at the fact that he always had to get up, but I stood my ground and said if he wants to muck up the sleep training, he can deal with the consequences. Rudi always had an excuse for getting up. What if he is cold? What if there is something wrong? What if…what if…
Roll on winter. New excuse at the top of the list – He probably kicked his blankets off and is cold. Rudi then started picking him up and bringing him to our bed, despite my protests. This happens every night now. Being winter, his door has swollen a bit and doesn’t open as easily anymore. This results in him tugging at the door and then sitting in a heap behind it crying to be let out. Now that he has realized that isn’t going to work, or that someone is always willing to come fetch him, he doesn’t even bother getting out of bed. Leaving the door open does not change this, he still sits and cries until he is fetched, which he is. Every night. At first sleeping with him was terrible. He is generally a very restless sleeper and being kicked/smacked/rolled over was a common occurrence. Somehow he has become much better at sleeping like a normal human being and turns around every now and then in a much more orderly fashion. He does, however, take after his father and rather loves the pregnancy pillow. I found him hogging it this morning, luckily after I had already gotten up to get ready for work.
I don’t approve of this development. Whenever it is mentioned to the day mother she says ‘Aww, but it’s winter, he is probably cold’. *sigh*. Nobody is on my side! This might also prove problematic when the new baby arrives. We’ll obviously have her in our room and have to wake up for her constantly at first. If I decide/manage to breastfeed Babyice might be in the way in our bed. The other morning just after he woke up he said to me ‘Our room’. I said ‘No, mommy and daddy’s room’, he smiled and said ‘OUR ROOM!’. Not good. Rudi is even more self conscious of leaving him to cry now because our new neighbours downstairs came to ask us if he is okay because they had heard him crying the night before (when we had tried to leave him to soothe himself). This morning Babyice was throwing a tantrum and Rudi was willing to do anything to shut him up (including giving him his dummy). When I tried to explain to him that rewarding that kind of behaviour would compound our problem, it came out that he was concerned about the neighbours trying to sleep. My opinion? They will need to put on their big girl panties and suck it up. We live there too. It is not like we are having drunken brawls or blasting loud music. We are dealing with a 2 year old the best way we know how. Now try to explain that to my husband. I care a lot less about what other people think of us than he does. Perhaps he is not wrong to give a damn, but he needs to be reasonable and so do they.
I don’t know how I could possibly fix the co-sleeping situation without Rudi’s buy in. I have been trying a long time to get him to listen. He is grumpy when he has to get up to go and fetch Babyice, but this seems a small price to pay. I guess we’ll have to play this by ear. Again.