acidicice

Rant

We went to see the gynae yesterday. Babyice weighs just over 1.5kg already! The gynae says the environment is so perfect in there, Babyice will most likely stay in there as long as he possibly can. He says I shouldn’t count on him coming any earlier than his due date. So I’ll be carrying into February, whether I like it or not! It’s a little bit of a relief since my maternity shoot is scheduled for the 1st of February. I was quite worried it was going to turn into a birth shoot or even a newborn shoot!  They gynae is completely happy and satisfied with Babyice’s progress and assures us there is absolutely nothing to worry about. We’ll be seeing him again on the 28th of December. I’m considering booking a 4D scan when Rudi and I are both on leave, but Rudi isn’t sure when his company will be closing down for the year yet.

 

My grandparents just don’t seem to be getting it. On Saturday we went with them to the Spur. It’s a little tradition that we have. I was sitting in the bend of the U-shaped table since I’m getting pretty big now and it’s difficult to seat me on the sides. I was literally trapped in there and they start discussing My Evil Mother and how terrible she looks and how she is starving, etc. I nearly lost my shit. I expressed my dismay at being forced to listen to the conversation (Rudi didn’t help since he was the one who asked how she is doing in the first place) and they eventually shut up.

 

This morning my grandmother phones me. I knew she had set up a meeting at a shelter of some sort for My Evil Mother to see if they had space for her. She calls me to tell me that it is a wonderful place and that they will be taking My Evil Mother in. She says the place is clean and pleasant and even has a pool. Apparently they will also help her find a job. Then she tries to put her on the phone. I tell her I do not want to speak to her. ‘Why not?’. Suddenly I feel like a dog. I feel SO guilty. I started crying and haven’t really stopped since. I’m hormonal dammit! I put the phone down and feel so guilty I phone her back. She then says that she understands that I’m upset and I must stop crying. She says My Evil Mother understands that I cannot speak to her. I can hear My Evil Mother telling her in the background (like a freaking high school teenager) ‘Oh and tell her I love her’..’Oh and tell her it’s okay I’ll forgive her for anything’ [Ed: I’m fucking sorry, what the fuck did I do wrong now again??]…’Oh and tell her she’s my baby and she’s having a baby’ or some crap like that.

 

YOU KNOW. FFS. So I phoned my grandfather and asked him WTF I am going to do with the two of them who just don’t seem to understand that I do not want to hear about it. At some point he says ‘Maybe we shouldn’t talk then.’ Is he kidding me? That upset me even more.

 

Maybe I should just block them all the fuck out.

 

*sigh* I can’t win.

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