acidicice

Oupa, I felt you here

So this might seem weird to those of you who don’t believe in this type of thing, but I do and in my own head this makes sense to me. I wouldn’t blame you for labelling me strange or a little psycho after you read this. It doesn’t really matter. This is my experience, as I experience it and that is what this here blog is for. Here goes…

 

On Friday I had a really emotional and sad day. The entire day I was plagued by thoughts of my grandfather. Aching for him. I tweeted about it, blogged about it, posted on my Facebook and BBM status about it throughout the day. It was clear on all my social networks how I was feeling and what it was about. I couldn’t understand why I was feeling this way. It was quite sudden and I put it down to receiving a letter from my grandfather’s old friends (the night before, when I wasn’t quite as affected by it. I didn’t even cry when reading it at first.) and the fact that the anniversary of his passing is drawing near.  It was one of the worst days I’d had since he actually passed away.

 

On Friday evening it all made sense. I received a call from Boogaloo (my brother from another mother). He called me around 20:00. His mother had passed away not an hour ago. It was very sudden. She was 64 years old. She had broken her arm less than two weeks prior to that and they had joked that she had broke her arms at such a ripe old age and on Friday evening she died on her son’s front porch from a heart attack.  At that moment I realized why I had been feeling out of sorts all day.  The reason I had felt so sad and so inconsolable all day was because of this. I think my grandfather was near. I think he came to fetch her. They had met once or twice, but Boogaloo (her son) lived with us for quite some time, some of which my grandparents lived with us too. Boogaloo and my grandfather loved each other. He came to visit him in hospital when he was very ill. He cried when he saw how his disease had ravished his body. He wasn’t the strong man that Boogaloo remembered. He came to his funeral.

 

It’s the only thing that makes sense in my head. It would only be right that my grandfather came to fetch his mom. I think I felt him.

 

I plan to attend the funeral in Heidelberg this weekend. It is a very long drive, but it really is the least I can do. Boogaloo is like a brother to me and I want to be there for him. I also knew his mom. She was the sweetest, most down to earth person I knew. I remember talking to her on the phone when Babyice was still little and she was trying to explain to me how to cut his hair while he was sleeping.

 

RIP Mrs. Swart. We will miss you x

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