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My Evil Mother – Update

So the wedding is in just over a week. My aunt is hosting a ‘pamper party’ (apparently this is the new thing, no more bridal showers or kitchen tea’s) for My Evil Mother on Saturday. I’m SO not in the mood to go. My Evil Mother didn’t bother coming to my bridal shower. On the one hand I’m kind of glad she didn’t. She probably would have been obnoxious and loud and tried to steal the lime light all the time. She did that at my wedding. I had to repeatedly SHUSH her while people were making speeches because she kept on making loud comments that were barely appropriate. I couldn’t even hear what the person speaking was saying. Annoying!

I cannot remember the last time I received a gift from My Evil Mother. It was probably Christmas 2005. Since then I did not get anything from her for my birthday, Christmas or my wedding. Not everything is about gifts though, right? This year for HER birthday, she sarcastically said ‘Thank you for my gift’ (I hadn’t bothered getting her one). If I haven’t mentioned this before, she didn’t wish me for my birthday and ignored me the whole day I was at my aunt’s house for the braai my aunt organised for me in honour of the occasion. She also didn’t buy me a gift. My birthday was after her birthday. So what is it really all about? Love? Family? Not for her.

I can’t help but feel that I was just a clean credit record for her. Another person she could manipulate for money and to make debt for her when her options started running out. I think one of the main reasons she doesn’t speak to me anymore is because she cannot use me anymore. Since my eyes have opened to her lies and her scheming…I can’t help but see through everything she says. I am flabbergasted by the extent of her lies and cannot help but question past events and situations. I completely mistrust everything the says. If she told me the sky was blue – I would go outside just to make sure.

Reconciliation? Unlikely. She doesn’t think she’s done anything wrong. My grandparents lost everything because of her. They had a paid off house, a paid off relatively new car and investments to cater for their retirement. They have none of that now. They live in something that can barely be called a bachelor flat. It is one room with a kitchenette and a bathroom. This is situated underneath someone else’s house. People that were good enough to take them in. The husband of the couple is very insecure and verbally abusive though. Especially towards my grandfather. All of this because My Evil Mother keeps repeating her mistakes and crawling, begging for forgiveness. She needs to change her life and change the things she does. She needs to become responsible and be accountable for her actions.

Don’t get me wrong. She has moments of remorse. She was bawling her eyes out at my wedding, begging me to forgive her. Why ruin my special day? Why make it about HER? Because it’s typical. That’s why. It would have been better if she hadn’t been there. Did you know she went to the restaurant where I had my reception the day before the wedding and left an unpaid bill there? The manager came to discuss the unpaid bill with me on my wedding day. MY day. The day I was supposed to be focused on my union with my husband. Not HER.

Speak of the devil. My aunt just requested I call her and My Evil Mother grabbed the phone. Her furniture (the furniture we assumed was sold due to non payment) has apparently been released free of charge. So why did she need to speak to me? Because she needs a place to put it (notice that she needs me…only speaks to me when she needs/wants something *sigh*) HA HA. Now she HAS to find somewhere to live. I really hope it works out for her. That would be great for my aunt and uncle too. I’m not holding my breath.

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