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Getting my groove back

I’ve been back at work for a week now. Despite the months of dreading having to come back, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. My boss has been mild, although it is clear that he hasn’t changed since I’ve been gone. My colleagues were happy to see me. A lot has changed since I left. Team members have been shuffled into different portfolios and we’ve gained one or two (despite losing 3). I suppose they factored my return into that.

True to form I was given work to do on my first day back. By Thursday I was getting the regular work load. It’s the show-no-mercy attitude of my team that has always made us shine out above the rest. Our performance criteria has changed yet again. They adjust our targets every 3 months when they realize we’re just going to hit it out of the park and force them to pay huge bonuses. It seems they’ve finally found a recipe for (their) success. I’m going to try my best to meet targets and continue earning lovely plush bonuses. Because I can! It’s basically like I never left around here. At first I struggled doing work at the pace I used to. The work itself hasn’t changed too much and by Thursday, despite panicking about not getting done on time, I was back into the swing of things. I can like to be picking things up fast again 🙂

Babyice seems to be getting sick again. He really was getting better, but on Saturday night he started barking during the night. The eye gunk has resurfaced and his nose is collecting green things (when it’s not running like a tap). We’re taking him back to the doctor this afternoon. Rather that than lay awake worrying about him all night like I did on Saturday. Stupid things go through my mind. I sit and wonder whether I should take him to the emergency room. I wonder if they’ll admit him to hospital. If they do…who will stay with him? Rudi was just off work for a week, I’ve been off work for 6 months and am not allowed leave for a month…there’s not really anyone else to ask since my grandmother is caring for my grandfather. Buggered. I’m sure it’s not that serious, but this is the kind of shit that goes through your head. I was definitely right about appreciating my time with him more. It’s like every second it precious. Working weekends is going to suck. I’m going to miss him endlessly 🙁

I hate it when he is sick, but at least he doesn’t have a fever. Fevers scare the bajeezus out of me. Probably because my grandparents blame the feveral convulsions my aunt and her son had for their mental disabilities. I realize that they probably didn’t cause their problems, but the fear is still there.

My grandfather is still really ill. His condition does not improve. It seems to be getting worse every day. He has asked for morphine now. Not a good sign. I think he still has a bit of time left, but I can’t be sure how much. We try to see them as often as we can, but it is difficult. We have so little time during the week in the evenings and weekends are usually filled with social engagements and very soon, work.

It’s my birthday on Wednesday. I cannot believe it has come so fast. There’s nothing really that I want, except something I can’t have. Isn’t that typical? My current heart’s desire is the Blackberry 9700 (Bold 2). It costs over R7000 and I don’t know anybody that can afford to buy me such a lavish gift…and the people I do know that have that kind of money, would never spend it on me. I wouldn’t expect them to anyway. My grandparents already bought me the rocking chair for my birthday and Rudi should be paying for my tattoo that I want to get. I actually dreamt about it last night and I’m looking forward to going to the studio to get it done. I haven’t decided exactly where I’m going to put it yet, but I reckon I’ll probably put it on my left shoulder. I still have to go and see the tattoo artist to discuss it with him as well. I’m going to go back to the guy who re-did my butterfly. I was completely satisfied with his work and even though he did it about 4 years or more ago it is still in perfect condition.

I’ve got another blog post to write for a competition entry…so I must be off.