March 9th, 2010 | Posted by acidicice

So yesterday we had our first doctor’s visit. I’m almost a R1000.00 poorer, but it was totally worth peace of mind. Babyice is only 5 weeks old today, but on Friday he started wheezing. I wasn’t too concerned on Friday, but it sounded like it got worse over the weekend and by Monday I was in a flat panic and wanting to take him to hospital at 5am because I didn’t want to wait for the doctor’s office to open. I barely slept and the one time I did manage to doze off I had a nightmare that we didn’t get to the doctor’s office in time and that he stopped breathing. After I woke up I couldn’t stop crying. I couldn’t shake the feeling the dream had left me with.  How his little body went limp in my arms. Fuck. It was traumatic.


After some Rescue Remedy and a cup of sweet tea Rudi managed to calm me down. I phoned the doctor’s office at 7:59 and they slotted us in for 9:00. Rudi and I quite like the doctor. He is very nice. Here are a few of the answers he gave me to my questions:

• We don’t use humidifiers in Cape Town. It’s humid enough here.
• Only professional physiotherapists should nebulise an infant.
• Formula is fortified and no multivitamin is required.
• We can have a fan on in the room with him in it, as long as it is not blowing on him.
• We can use the aircon in the car.
• He should be wearing at least a vest, even if it’s very hot.
• It is okay to swaddle him in the heat in a thin blanket if it helps him sleep.
• There is no hard and fast rule about whether babies should sleep on their tummies or backs.

He didn’t change the formula we have Babyice on, which is quite a relief because it is much more cost effective than the previous one. He is 100% happy with Babyice’s growth and everything we’ve told him. He doesn’t believe that he will be a colic baby, which is SUCH a relief! The biggest problem he saw was some thrush which he gave us some oral gel for. It’s already cleared up, so we’ll continue treating it for another 2 days as per his instructions


Babyice now weighs 4.38kg, is 55cm tall and his head circumference is 39cm. He even said we could consider this our 6 week check up and didn’t have to go again! The noise we were so concerned about is apparently just a flap in his throat which might have some milk on it. It is a lot worse than it sounds and no cause for concern. He referred us to an ENT specialist who can put a pipe down baby’s throat to be sure, but said it would only be for our peace of mind.


So next week he has to go get his first set of shots. EEK! I’m dreading it!!!!

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March 3rd, 2010 | Posted by acidicice

When we found out about Jamie, our District Elder came to our house with our house priest to pray for us and her and to advise us. The ranking of the ministry in our church is more or less as follows (shoot me cos I don’t know exactly):


Deacon < Priest < Evangelist < District Evangelist < District Elder


So the District Elder holds quite a “high” ministry. What I’m trying to say is that he doesn’t easily make house calls. He shared with us that night his experience. Him and his wife lost their first child. Also a girl. He could understand how we were feeling. He advised us to take guidance from the medical professionals regarding our choice and assured us we would care for Jamie’s soul.


We hold special services for the Departed. We pray for those who have passed on and offer to be vessels of grace for them. Not only people we know, mind you. It could be someone you heard about, or something you saw on the news. Anybody you can remember and who is willing to accept the prayer is welcome. There were many services after Jamie’s passing and there were a few where I clearly understood she was there.


We scheduled Elijah’s baptism for Sunday at random. We asked for him to be baptised and they agreed on last Sunday. My house priest mentioned that another couple had also asked for baptism and that they would be joining us. I was comforted by the thought of not having to stand up there alone with Rudi. It also turned out that the District Elder was booked in our congregation and would be doing the baptism.


The other couple had a baby girl. Her name is Jamie.


I couldn’t have asked for a clearer sign that she was with us on Elijah’s special day. Of course I shed some tears at the altar. The District Elder (without knowing what we had named our previous child) especially prayed for family from the beyond that were not there to witness the occasion before the baptism. He also said he noticed that I held Elijah tightly…and that he was sure he had a special meaning for us.


It was a rather special spiritual experience for me that the District Elder happened to be there to baptise Elijah and that Jamie was there too. I know she was. I don’t believe in coincidence and am grateful that I was able to see and acknowledge these things. Next week is Service for the Departed (We have them four times a year). I’m going to try my best to take Elijah.


P.S. Good news! The maternity shoot photos are FINALLY up! See them here.

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March 2nd, 2010 | Posted by acidicice

On Sunday Babyice was baptised. The day before the baptism we left him in the care of my grandparents while we did our monthly grocery shop. I didn’t want to take him to a shopping centre just yet.

Shortly after coming home he started screaming blue murder. He continued to do so for almost an hour. Nothing we did seemed to help. Eventually I called @cazpi and she gave us some advice. Not long after implementing some of her suggestions, he slept. We were fearful we would get no sleep before the baptism and fall asleep in church. I feared he would scream during church and his baptism…which would be horrible. It’s terribly distracting. I’ve witnessed baptisms where this has been the case.

He proved us completely wrong! He slept like a champion on Saturday night and slept right through service and the baptism. He didn’t even cry when they put the water on his forehead. He was SUCH a good boy.

My grandfather had to take photos and we really didn’t get many. Only about four or five.

My Evil Mother was there and got to meet him for the first time. After service we had tea and cake at my in law’s house. She held him a bit and fed him. She behaved herself and even brought a small gift. She left early. Apparently Coke Head gave her a curfew. Suited me fine.

All in all we had a blessed day. It was wonderful!

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February 24th, 2010 | Posted by acidicice

I know. I’m alive. Really.


The last three weeks have been difficult. Being a parent is…challenging to say the least, especially if you have no clue what you are doing. Thank goodness for friends like @cazpi who has been a lifesaver. She has been super supportive and helpful and has come out to take care of us at the drop of a hat. She has opened her home to us when we needed her. She has proven to be a great friend. Big love to you Caz!


When we took Babyice for his 2 week check up the clinic sister was dubious about his weight gain. She was unsure as she wasn’t the last sister to weigh him and didn’t know what he had been weighed in (we couldn’t remember if she had kept his nappy on or not, I think she did). She said he might not be latching on correctly and may only be getting foremilk from my breast, not the hindmilk like he should be getting. So his thirst is being quenched, but he might not be getting sustenance as such.


We went and bought ingredients for jungle juice and nipple shields to try and help. We also bought formula just in case. That night he wouldn’t stop screaming. He was crying the entire time. We decided to top him up with some formula as a once off to see if he ate enough. He gulped down the formula and went to sleep. From the next feed we were back on the breast and by the next day he started crying again. Eventually I was in tears and couldn’t stop crying myself. Caz rushed over and offered to take us in for a couple of nights to see if she could help. The next day she took me to her clinic sister. What a wonderful woman! She helped me latch properly and gave me some advice. She also gave me some free samples! Because of her free samples we figured out that Babyice prefers Avent to NUK. Perfect! We went and bought a breast pump as well, in case.


He did okay that night, after having some more formula. I pumped some breast milk so that my breasts would think he is feeding when we were giving him formula and we came home the next day. The weekend went okay feeding on the breast only, but by Sunday night he was screaming again. For one particular feed I was feeding him for two hours on the breast and he still wasn’t satisfied. I tried both and made sure we were latching correctly. I reverted to the bottle and BOOM. Hunger satisfied, sleeping baby.


It was then that I realized that I needed to make a decision. I was torturing myself and him with the breastfeeding and he clearly wasn’t getting enough food.


I was gutted. I had my heart set on breastfeeding my baby. It is what is best for them and I wanted to do it for at least six months, but it just wasn’t working for us. I beat myself up over it. Suffered with painful breasts while I tossed and turned over the decision…but I needed to make up my mind and I needed to decide what is best for our family and for our baby. I spoke to Rudi and we decided that we would switch him to formula.


He has been on formula since Monday and he is a completely different baby. He is much happier, sleeps better, his nappies are looking much better and we’re both much more relaxed. Now that I know he is well fed I’m not constantly worried about him being hungry. If he is crying I know it is because he has a wind/needs to be changed/needs a cuddle and isn’t screaming because he is not satisfied. We have another clinic visit today (they wanted to keep an eye on him) and I’m sure he would have done a lot better this week!


I know that a lot of women feel very strongly about this and will probably want to burn me at the stake, but I tried my best. I really did. After telling my grandmother this morning that we’d decided to change him to formula she said ‘Yes. Nobody in our family has ever been able to successfully breastfeed’. NOW she tells me. Although, that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t have been able to.


Now we’re settling in to our new pattern and things are going much better!

Babyice had a newborn shoot the other day (above picture from the shoot as well). Wanna see? Check out some of the photos on @cazpi’s blog here.


As soon as I get my maternity shoot pictures from Johannesburg and gotten his newborn shoot pics I’ll upload albums to Facebook from Baby Shower to Newborn shoot for you all to see

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February 15th, 2010 | Posted by acidicice

So here are some of my maternity shoot photos! Taken just about 24 hours before Babyice came into the world! Talk about leaving it for the last minute. So these were literally taken on my last day of being pregnant.


No, she did not chop my head off in all the pictures, click on the pics to see the full image

Can’t wait to get all the pictures from all 3 photogs to post an album on Facebook! Will also be doing a newborn shoot for Babyice this weekend…so more gorgeous photos coming up!


Photos taken by @queenofcomplex of Life Images

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February 11th, 2010 | Posted by acidicice

We left the hospital week ago today. We’ve had a couple of rough nights and a couple of good ones. He is generally a very good baby and hasn’t given us any major problems. We had him circumcised last week Friday. I had to leave the room. The doctor hadn’t even looked at him and I burst into tears! He was very understanding though. Apparently it’s quite common for mommies to run away The wound has healed very well and we get to go back tomorrow for the doctor to check him out. Not looking forward to yanking him out the house though. He doesn’t adapt well to change in the environment just yet and we have trouble getting him to feed/sleep when we’ve had visitors and such.


Yesterday we went to the clinic for his 1 week check up. He weighs exactly the same now as he did when he was discharged from the hospital. The nurse is very happy with that. Apparently as long as they don’t lose weight it’s all good. She gave me some breastfeeding tips and tips about his skin.


He seems to be peeling the top layer of his skin off. Apparently this is normal. It looks awful and flaky. The sister suggested we use aqueous cream to bath him and apply it during the day. Suddenly I am grateful for the 10 huge tubs of aqueous cream I have!


I can’t believe he is over a week old already! Time certainly is flying! I have already had to send Rudi on his first nappy run as we ran out of size 1’s. I only bought one pack, not knowing how big he is going to be.


I am still receiving flowers and gifts. Thank you all so much! Big love <3


I took this photo today:

So all in all we are settling in as well as can be expected for clueless parents with a newborn. Thank you to my friends who are guiding me and giving me advice. I really appreciate it! Mommies helping new mommies


Please excuse my lack of blog posts…it’s really hard getting online at the moment! Tiny little person needs me for EVERYTHING!

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February 9th, 2010 | Posted by acidicice

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February 7th, 2010 | Posted by acidicice

Sjoe. Where to begin?


My maternity shoot took place on Monday as planned. We spent the afternoon/early evening on the beach in Blouberg taking photos. Being a model? Not so glamorous…especially if you feel like a beached whale (the beach theme was very fitting and all ) @queenofcomplex was fantastic. You can tell she works with people who don’t like getting their picture taken. Heh. She made me feel comfortable and let me voice my concerns about how certain parts of me would look and gave me tips on how to make them look better. @cazpi got some ADORABLE photos…you can see her sneak preview here. Rudi was able to attend the shoot as we had it after working hours which was really nice! He was running around on the beach while we were taking photos…throwing stones around and stuff. I thought he was being rather juvenile…until he came up to me and presented me with a heart shaped rock…which he had been searching for the entire time *heart melts* Don’t think I didn’t feel bad for thinking the worst!


Right at the end of the shoot we decided to take some pics of my belly uncovered, but we were next to quite a busy little street and it seemed like all the joggers had come out for the day. @andrevr and Rudi had to stand holding up a sheet so that I couldn’t be seen from the street. At some point a car slowed down and stopped to try and see what was going on behind the sheet! They must have thought it was some kind of porn shoot! @andrevr kept pretty much to himself and stayed in the background most of the time. It was very difficult being photographed by 3 people. Looking at 3 different cameras is hard! @queenofcomplex dominated the shoot (it was her shoot to begin with) and she showed me some of the photos she got along the way. I’ve got a feeling we got some AWESOME photos and I can’t WAIT to see them!


After the shoot we joined our Twitter friends for a tweetup in honour of Her Royal Highness (@queenofcomplex) being in Cape Town. We were almost an hour late because Capetonians don’t need Tom Toms and everyone was already there when we arrived. We enjoyed a lovely dinner and some #pinkdrinks with the crowd and got away there around 23:00. By the end of dinner I was feeling decidedly uncomfortable. My back was sore and I couldn’t find a comfortable position to sit in. I put it down to the hard chairs at the restaurant and didn’t think too much of it.


Rudi and I came home and went straight to bed. I kept waking up with what felt like bad cramps. They started in my back and moved forward into my stomach. This continued all through the night, but not very often. Rudi went off to work, but I couldn’t get back to sleep. The pains just continued to come. I assumed I had overdone it the previous day with the photo shoot and dinner, causing some Braxton Hicks contractions. Persistent ones at that! I chatted to MeeA and Pinkhairgirl about what was happening and they kept checking on me to see how I was doing. I started timing the pains which I had now started referring to as contractions and they were between 11 and 7 minutes apart. At about 12:15 I had a show and called Rudi home. I called my gynae’s office and they recommended I come in to the labour ward to be checked. I told them I’d time my contractions for another 30 minutes or so and then decide. They were now around 5 minutes apart. I was dying to say something on Twitter or Facebook, but I had dreamt that night that I went into hospital and was really embarrassed that they sent me back home, so I put it on ice. After another 30 minutes the contractions were consistently arriving 5 minutes apart and we decided to go to hospital. I notified them I was on my way.


We arrived at the hospital with the hospital bag and everything in tow. They put me on the monitors to check baby’s heartbeat and try to monitor the contractions. My gynae arrived shortly after and said I was definitely in labour. I was still in denial! Oh my! This was happening and I had no way of stopping it! I alerted Twitter and Facebook to Babyice’s imminent arrival.


The gynae offered me an epidural and I gladly accepted. I was 2cm dilated at the time. I had the poor man in a tizz. He had failed to administer an epidural on me before and was well aware of the fact that I was sceptical about it working. The administration of the epidural hurt a lot more than I remember it doing the last time. I flinched while he was doing it as well…BUT he got it to work! I felt absolutely no pain. I could see the contractions on the monitor, but felt nothing. It was awesome! So the wait began…


We were waiting around, they came to check me again around 5PM and I had dilated about 5cm. They added some drugs to increase the frequency of the contractions and to help baby move down into my pelvis. We watched some TV, chatted a bit and around 6PM I told Rudi to go and get himself something to eat as it didn’t look like anything was going to happen really soon. Rudi left and at around 6:40 the gynae came back to check my progress. He said I better call my husband, I was 9cms dilated and the baby would be there by 7:30 latest. He told me they were switching the epidural off.


I was like, WHAT? No! Why do you have to do that?! I was terrified. Petrified. I had seen the contractions I was having on the monitor before the epidural was administered and I could see the ones I was having now were much more frequent and intense. They had just become practically unbearable before the epidural kicked in and I could not imagine what they would be like now. I phoned Rudi and told him to hurry. He probably took around 15 minutes to get back…I was in flat panic. The nurse was readying the room and suddenly it felt like I had NO TIME AT ALL and that Rudi would not make it in time. He finally arrived and I started crying. I told him I was scared and he assured me everything would be fine. I didn’t believe him.


Soon the gynae was back…when he took his watch off I knew I was in trouble! Rudi had the camera ready and it was time. I was completely unable to use my left hand as they had inserted a drip into my left wrist. The gynae asked Rudi to stand on that side to hold my leg. Suddenly I was given the instruction to push! Rudi was very encouraging and supportive…helping me along. Big love to him. A few big pushes and I heard Babyice cry for the first time.


I had done it! At 19:34 Babyice was born! He weighed 3.555kg and was 51cms tall.


While all this was going on there was a frenzy happening on Twitter. I had asked shortly after announcing I was in labour if my friends could get #Babyice to become a trending topic on Twitter…and did they ever! #Babyice became the hottest topic on Twitter, even beating out our country’s president Jacob Zuma who was recently involved in a paternity scandal of sorts. *Our* baby kicked the PRESIDENT off his spot! He hadn’t even entered the world and he enjoyed 15 minutes of fame! Thank you to all my Twitter friends for your support and encouragement!


He is too gorgeous for words. This is the first picture ever taken of him:

I posted the picture to Twitter. This picture got over 833 views!


So I came away from this experience a new mother, with a few bumps and bruises and only 3 stitches. I am so proud of myself and our new baby!


*BEAMS*

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January 29th, 2010 | Posted by acidicice

My first week at home has been lovely. It has been very relaxing and it seems Babyice is also relaxing and won’t be coming too early. I’m already over 38 weeks and no indication that he feels like making an entrance just yet.


He needs to stay in there till at least Monday. On Monday I’ll be having my maternity shoot. @queenofcomplex, @cazpi and @andrevr will be trying to make my bump and I look pretty. I’m really lucky to have such a talented bunch of people take interest in me and helping me to commemorate this time in my life. Thanks guys! I can’t wait to see the results! I will definitely post some pics here and on Facebook. I’m not quite sure how I’m going to feel with 3 beeeg lenses pointed at me on Monday! I have serious confidence issues and even though I love attention – I need to draw it onto myself instead of people lavishing it on me…if that makes sense? Also…they will be focusing on my tummy and I have some new stretchmarks (lovely purple ones) and pregnancy makes you hairy man! I don’t want to shave the hair off because it will most likely just grow back thicker and look much worse! Queenofcomplex swears she is a photoshop wizz…so I’m hoping she manages to make things look okay! We’ll also be doing a tweetup  on Monday evening since @queenofcomplex is from Johannesburg and she’d like to meet all the Cape Town people she chats to every day


On Wednesday I went into the office where they had planned a surprise baby shower for me. It was really sweet and they had fruit salad and ice cream to eat! Nom! Now I will only return there to show my colleagues Babyice.


My Evil Mother is back on the scene. She started calling my grandparents again. My grandfather spoke to her about staying away from the hospital when I give birth.  She agreed to do so and I hope she does. She was telling them how she has started a new job and just calling them to chat. I was waiting for the bombshell to drop and it didn’t even take a week. Last night my grandmother called me. She was really upset. Apparently Coke Head had called her saying she must ‘Come fetch her fucking daughter. She is working on his nerves’, etc. The fucking bastard. He would not dare speak to me or my grandfather like that. He wouldn’t dare. Coward! My grandmother was in tears asking me what she must do. Well, there isn’t really anything she can do. It just seems so convenient that she was calling talking about her new job, etc. and now she suddenly needs a place to stay again because her abusive husband is kicking her out. The husband that she went crawling back to after my grandparents found her a safe house. Sounds a bit well thought out if you ask me. Apparently she told my grandmother she had to leave the safe house because my grandmother and I told the lady in charge there she couldn’t be trusted with money. *ahem*. I never told her anything of the sort. I saw her once and didn’t want to talk to her at all.  I did make it clear to her that I didn’t want anything to do with my mother, but we didn’t discuss my reasons or any of the history. My grandmother was also very careful about what she told the lady of the safe house as she did not want to ruin My Evil Mother’s chances of making a fresh start. It is SO typical of her. Blaming everyone else for her mistakes. So predictable. All the more reason for me to stand firm against her. No sign of any change in her.


I can’t believe Babyice is almost here. Before you know it…he is here and I am learning faster than I have in my life before. It’s all so exciting and scary!

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January 26th, 2010 | Posted by acidicice

Rudi and I wanted to see Avatar in 3D over the weekend and on a whim decided to book tickets on Saturday. Do you think we could find two seats together in any one show? Practically fully booked the entire weekend! Avatar has been playing for a while now. That is quite impressive! So we decided to book for the 17:15 show yesterday. Angel has often mentioned Ster-Kinekor’s love nest seats, but I couldn’t find any open love nest seats on the aisle. I have to sit on the aisle, especially since it is a 3 hour movie and you know I am going to have to pee.


I booked two seats and as I was about to make the payment my Internet Explorer blocked the pop-up. I was irritated beyond belief. When going back in after allowing pop-ups for the site I had to book the row in front of the row I had chosen since the two I had just selected were still temporarily reserved for my purchase.


I forgot that you have to climb stairs to get anywhere in the movies at Tygervalley. Even the loo is down a flight of stairs. Forking lovely. When we got into the cinema I checked the seat layout at the back and determined our seats were on the left of the aisle. We settled in. The seats at Tygervalley are definitely more comfortable than those at Cape Gate! A little while before the movie started some guys showed up and said we were in their seats. Looking back at the seat numbers we were, in fact, in the wrong seats! Our seat was on the right hand side of the aisle! Best part? Our seat was a love nest seat! So by many frustrating (and embarrassing) co-incidences, we managed to get a love nest seat on the aisle. I am pretty sure that the seat was not a love nest seat when I made the booking…and it seems the seat layout at the back must have been upside down. So we win because of Ster-Kinekor’s fail. Nice. I was super chuffed! It really is like sitting on a small couch while watching the movie. I will definitely opt for the love nest seats again! I might even rather go to Tygervalley to watch a movie in general since their seats are so much more comfortable.


Anyway…the 3D effects in the movie were by far the best I have seen so far. I have gone to see Coraline and Ice Age 3 in 3D already and was actually not that impressed. Avatar, however, was really awesome. The 3D effect was carried through the entire movie and even though there wasn’t always something coming towards your face, I really enjoyed the feel of the effects (which is more than I can say for the other two). The story line was also very cool. In general it was a very good movie. Even Rudi gave it 8 out of 10


The only crap thing about the movie was, well, me. About halfway through the movie I started feeling nauseous and getting hot flushes. I also started getting some cramping feelings in my lower belly. They hurt! I almost thought that Babyice was on his way! I got up to go to the loo and ended up missing around 10 minutes of the movie. I’ve been pregnant every time I’ve been to see a 3D movie and this has never happened to me. I must assume that the superior 3D quality of this particular movie must have caused me to feel this way. I’ve heard of people getting nauseous, etc. I always thought they were a bunch of sissies. Who doesn’t have the stomach to handle some 3D? Life is in 3D, after all. Apparently I don’t. Wah.


I would recommend for anyone to go and see this movie. It really is beautiful and a stunning story. I also could not imagine having seen it in 2D. The 3D rocks the party that rocks the party (and my stomach). Totally worth the price you pay for it!

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